Black Belt Living...in a nut shell

I believe in trying new things in life. I feel that by getting out of my comfort zone, learning new information, putting myself in challenging situations that force me to sharpen my skills or create skills I never had, can only serve me in growing into the man I want become. As a kid I always assumed that when I became an adult I would “have it all down” and be the person I supposed to be. Who knew I’d have to work so hard and continually learn from mistakes?

Life is just one big journey and it’s up to you to make of it what you want it to be. It can full of conflict or full of love. It can be a learning experience or a dull void where not even a weed could grow in the garden of your mind. It can be exciting or dull and mundane. Life can be empty or it can be meaningful. Life can be lonely or can be filled with loving and supportive people. Life is not about finding yourself, life is about creating yourself. Yet you’re usually told something different early on aren’t you?

How many times growing up did you hear the phrase, “you’ll find yourself.”? Mom, Dad, a teacher or coach perhaps started the conversation, “when you grow up you’ll finally find yourself….” As if you were not there all along. The downside to this is that every time you go looking for yourself, you are already there. I don’t believe in “finding”, I believe in creating. I believe that you can become what you want to become. So rather than looking for yourself, start thinking about what you want, and then start planning on how you’ll achieve that. You’ll be better off for it, you’ll enjoy the process much more, you’ll grow, you’ll stretch, you’ll learn.

A year ago, I knew my wife Mary and I were going to move from Tampa Bay, FL. to Denver, CO. and it was one of the best choices I’ve made in years! I couldn’t be happier here- I have the worlds biggest playground an hour from my house. Hiking, biking, horseback riding, camping, etc, all in a stone’s throw away. Before I moved I owned and operated Clearwater Boxing in Clearwater, FL. and I decided that I needed a change in careers for a short while, so I decided to become a Financial Advisor. I had no background in finance or a degree in finance, but I had been looking around for some time to find something else I may be able to sink my teeth into the way I do with coaching people and running my own business. So, I went for it.

I did everything one is supposed to do to get a good position with a large company like Morgan Stanley; a good resume, referrals, suit, tie and knock ‘em dead at the interview. It all worked as I was hired on the spot in my interview. I then studied for and passed all of the licensing exams (perhaps the most pain-through-boredom I’ve ever endured in my life), went through the rest of the training provided by the company and then hit the streets as a full fledged Financial Advisor. I hate it. I think a good analogy is that I may have been climbing the ladder of success, the problem was that it was leaning against the wrong wall. But then again, I wanted a new experience to learn more, to grow, to expand and get out of my comfort zone by doing something that I had never done before so that I could see if I could become successful at something new. And I did.

However, I’m a Martial Artist through and through. I love training, competing (or at least when I was younger and it didn’t hurt so bad), learning and of course teaching and sharing what I know with others. I love to help other people reach their full potential whether that be physically, mentally, emotionally or spiritually. To see people work for something so important and then achieve it actually makes me feel like I have achieved my own goal! It is just amazing the benefits I get from helping others. So that’s why I have started Black Belt Living back up again.

I first created Black Belt Living in 2004 after many years of trial and error on creating the course that can help others achieve their most important goals. I used to think that people would be able to connect the dots from using the principles of success I taught in the Dojo, and translate them into the work world or at home. It rarely happened the way I felt it should. There was a disconnect between what I would say, explain how to use the principle and then getting anyone to take action on it. The students needed more from me and I needed to be both more creative in my programs and more clear in my methods. And so Black Belt Living was created.

I chose the name Black Belt Living because when you thinks of a Black Belt, you think of someone who is disciplined, focused and has mastered themselves both physically and mentally. You think of someone who is a little more enlightened than the next guy and extremely confident and secure in who they are and where they’re going in life. Through this course, you will literally become a Black Belt in Life.

The Black Belt Living course is complete because it has programs that help you define what your life’s purpose is, what your life’s mission is, what your most important goals are and how you’ll achieve them. Black Belt Living offers a means for you to develop physically through the FightZone Fitness program, which I have used to get my fighters and myself in great shape for competition, as well as general health. Black Belt Living also helps you get more in touch with yourself and your higher power (God, Spirit, Allah, Buddha, etc. whatever name you choose) through the Principles in Action course. These courses are all designed to be short, simple and yet extremely precise and very effective.

These courses are the link between what you do in the dojo and what you do in life to become a successful, contributing member of the community and a person of high moral character. Just because you earn a Black Belt in the Martial Arts at someone’s school, does not mean that you are a Black Belt at living life. These courses change that. They will change you physically, mentally and spiritually. You’ll never see life the same again because your view of it will transform, grow and become so much more than it is now. You’ll give more to others because you’ll have more of you to give. You’ll achieve more because you’ll have created strategies to get you to your goals faster and with more precision. And you’ll feel better about, and more connected to, yourself because you’ll have become the person you always wanted to, both inside and out.

Take a look at the web site, www.BlackBeltLiving.com and see if there is anything you have questions about. Then call me or send an e-mail so we can discuss it.

Talk to you soon,

Coach John Kyle

3.5 Types of Goals For The New Year

 

What would you say if I told you that you could achieve your upcoming New Year’s resolutions faster, with more excitement, passion and maybe, just maybe, without fail this year? Would you believe me? (Probably not.)Well first of all, do you even have those goals? If you do I bet you’ve got some good ones, huh? But do you have clear, written and specific goals? Right there, I’ll bet that you do not. Listen, everyone has something that he or she wants to achieve, become, do or have, and the reality is that most of them will fail miserably this year. Not because they don’t want to accomplish their goals or that they don’t care about the goals that they’ve set (I’m 100% sure that they do!) but they’ll most likely not create those goals in the most effective and powerful way possible.

So, if you want to reach that next level in life, achieve that dream you’ve been chasing, become the person you’ve striving for and NOT fail wretchedly like all of the other people who will this year, then you’ll want to compare your current goals up to my 3.5 Types of Goals for the New Year:

1. M.E. Goals- M.E. Goals are perhaps the most crucial aspect of creating any goal you’ll ever set. Why? Because they’re about YOU! M.E. goals are about what’s most important to you. M.E. goals are about what excites you, what creates passion for you and what makes you get up and go to work each day. (Outside of paying the bills of course.)

The M stands for Motivating which means you need to ask the question “does this excite me?” It is hard to work to achieve a goal when there is no momentum or energy behind you. Motivation is a key point in reaching your dreams and aspirations because you’ll need that excitement on the days when nothing seems to be going your way, or when accomplishing the goal seems too far away or too difficult too attain.

The E stands for Engaging which means you need to ask the question “does this goal speak to me on a deeper level?” Not only should a goal motivate you, but it needs to create passion, meaning and purpose. Otherwise, you may be excited to accomplish the goal, but you’ll be left asking “why the heck did I even begin in the first place?” Be sure that you’re not just motivated, but that you are finding a deeper meaning in what you are working towards in your life, because when you’re at the end of the road, I guarantee that you’ll look back and ask “why did I” or “why didn’t I?”

Here are a few questions to ask to create M.E. Goals:

·         Does this goal excite me?

·         Does this goal create momentum for me?

·         Can this goal get me motivated on the days I want to quit?

·         Does this goal speak to me on a deep level?

·         Does this goal help give meaning to my life?

·         Does this goal provide purpose and direction for me?

·         How will I feel at the end of the road if I do not attempt to reach this goal?

2. S.M.A.R.T. Goals- Having goals such as ‘I want to get into shape’ or ‘I want to make money’ just don’t cut it. These goals are far too general for you to achieve. When creating goals for yourself, whether it be in physical fitness, education, financial matters, etc., they need to meet certain criteria in order to be attainable goals. They need to be S.M.A.R.T. goals. Once you understand how the brain works, you’ll see the need to meet the S.M.A.R.T. criteria. Try this: look around the room where you are and find the color blue. Now find red. Now green. Now yellow. It didn’t take you long did it? This is because the brain will literally filter out anything you do not want in order to give you what you do want- if it knows exactly what that is. When you say ‘I want to make a lot of money’, the brain has nothing to work with- what exactly is a lot of money? 3000, 10,000, 50,000, how much? If you were to give the brain a specific amount, it can function better and help you achieve that goal quicker. (You can get even more specific - just read #3.5)

If your goal can meet the following S.M.A.R.T. Goal criteria, then you stand a great chance of accomplishing your goals:

·         S- Specific- how detailed and precise is this goal?

·         M-Measurable- can I calculate or appraise this goal?

·         A- Achievable-can I complete this goal?

·         R- Realistic- am I being level-headed and practical with this goal?

·         T- Trackable- can I keep track of any results or actions in regards to this goal?

3. “Q” Goals- Another good idea to have in regards to making your goals for the upcoming year is make them “Quantifiable”. One of the goals I set for myself during my test for 6^th Degree Black Belt was “to raise the awareness of the effects of drugs, alcohol and gangs in my community by speaking to 5000 people.” I found these people at local rehab centers, churches and Jr. High and High Schools. After I began working towards my goal, I soon discovered that reaching the number of 5000 came quicker than I anticipated, and so I doubled the goal to 10,000 after only 6 months had gone by. However (and much to my surprise), by the time I tested for my new Black Belt, I had reached over 14,000 people. By having a number attached to my goal, it allowed me to be specific, measure the goal and track the results I made as well. But most importantly, by having a number associated with the goal, I was allowed to quantify not just the amount of people I spoke to, but the results as well. In other words; I may have directly spoken to more than 14,000 people and touched their lives in a healthy positive manner over a short period of time, but who knows how many lives those 14,000 people touched. Now that’s getting Quantified!

Having a Quantifiable number as part of a goal also allows you to break down a larger goal into smaller and more manageable amounts. For instance; if you set a goal of doing 52,000 push-ups in one year’s time, it certainly meets the criteria for the S.M.A.R.T. method, but the amount is so large that it may seem impossible to achieve! However, if you were to break it down into smaller sections, you’ll see that it becomes much more attainable: 52,000 per year = 1000 push-ups per week. Those 1000 push-ups per week = 143 push-ups per day. Those 143 push-ups can be broken down into sets of 25 and all you have do is about 6 sets of 25 push-ups each day to reach your goal. Or, you could do 1000 push-ups spread out over a 5 day period rather than 7, which would break down to 200 per day, which could then be done in sets of 50 or 25. (Or you could do those 1000 push-ups in a one hour setting like me and Mary!) Again, “Q” goals not only allow you to break the amounts down into maintainable sizes, but add more to increase your level of accomplishments as well!

·         Is there a number attached to the goal?

·         If so, it can then be measured, tracked and quantified! 

3.5 “I Will” Goals- As stated above, most goals that people create are either too general to focus on, or too weak to get motivated from. Look at those goals I mentioned above again: I want to get into shape, I want to make money. Outside of what has already been said, these goals have a serious lack of commitment. That is why another great idea you’ll need to implement into your goals for this year is to add the “I Will” statement. By starting your goal with the statement “I Will”, you place yourself in a position of obligation of reaching that goal- no matter what. By having that “I Will” statement written down, you literally convince yourself that you will achieve it, and you’ll then begin to believe that the goal is something that you will do. Having the “I Will” statement written down, reminds you of what needs to be done- it keeps you responsible and accountable for the results and makes sure that you cannot blame the lack of effort or resolve on anyone else but yourself. The “I Will” statement makes you deeply committed to your goal which is of high value because you’ll have many, many negative things come to pass and challenge your tenacity as you attempt to accomplish what you want. Some of these challenges will be big and others will be small but I promise you that you will be tested, and knowing what you will do can many times make all of the difference between failing and succeeding.

Here are a few examples of “I Will” goals that also provide meaning and excitement (M.E.), and meet most of the S.M.A.R.T. and “Q” criteria:

·         I will lose 20 pounds and have a 31 inch waist by March 30^th, 2009

·         I will make 50,000 this year with both my full time job and on-line business.

·         I will become a division manager of my company by July, 2009

·         I will graduate college by 2011 with a GPA of 3.5 and have a job making 45,000

·         I will spend and extra 260 hours this year with my family to build healthy relationships (5 hours per week x 52 weeks)

·         I will test for and receive my Black Belt in March 2012

FREE OFFER: Need to run your goals past someone this year to ensure that they meet most of the criteria above? Give me a call or shoot me an e-mail. CoachJohnKyle@Gmail.com I am also available to teach seminars as well at no cost. There are 3 this month to take advantage of!!